After writing about Bridget Donovan’s marriage to George Merritt in so much detail, I thought I’d better write about our own wedding…especially as it’s our 13th Wedding Anniversary today.
Geoff and I were married at the Pymble Ladies’ College Chapel in Sydney on the 9th September, 2001 and we had our reception at historic Curzon Hall. It was a fabulous day where I smiled so much that my face hurt. I was so incredibly happy…beyond happy even.
Love this shot of us with the steeple in the background. Very romantic!
I am a very sentimental person and our wedding ceremony was redolent with meaning as a special reflection of the love we felt for each other and for alll our precious family and friends who were handpicked to be there. Everything and everyone was special. As it is with so many weddings, there were so many memories, intimate personal and family connections all interwoven to make it such a magic day. We were married by my Pastor, Pastor Neville Otto from St Mark’s Lutheran Church in nearby Epping . Geoff’s Pastors, Pastors Narelle & David Crabtree from Dayspring Christian Fellowship, said the prayers while my Grandfather, Pastor Bert Haebich, gave the blessing. My best friend from school and my cousins were my bridesmaids and my brother was a groomsman. I had managed to get the retired music mistress to play the school organ and we had a couple of school hymns along with the Prayer of St Francis of Assisi which has that famous line: Make me a channel of your peace…Even though I had had to memorise I Corinthians 13 in the King James Version complete with punctuation back in Year 6, when it came to Bible verses we chose the 23rd Psalm (my grandmother’s favourite passage and probably mine too these days). We also had Isaiah 40:27-31 which includes this wonderful passage: But those who hope in the Lord Will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles”. If only. I could use a set of eagle’s wings today. There was also Colossians 3:12-17. This passage, while directed at the early Christians is a bit of a beauty as among other things it talks about the importance of forgiveness. I also had the Prayer to the Ephesians printed in the Order of Service. My cousin Angela sang “O Lord Most Holy” to the tune of Ave Maria during the signing of the register.
I look back on the choices we made and they seem very idealistic in hindsight but you have to go into marriage with enough idealism and faith to get you through life’s many ups and downs and sometimes these mountains can feel like Everest. It can be pretty hard at times to hold onto your ideals, your love and even a shred of hope. That is marriage just as much as all the lovey dovey stuff.
If you asked anybody what was special about our wedding, aside from all the usual comments about how everyone looked, they would probably mention the Order of Service which I produced. It was decorated throughout with scanned images taken from an old German family Bible which my grandfather had received from his grandfather for his 21st birthday. I’m sure one of my friends described this Order of Service as a novel. I wrote a three page letter outlining how we met and our plans for the future entitled: “With A View to Eternity: A Letter from the Bride”. My husband said it was just as well it was so wordy because it gave everyone something to read. You see, I arrived half an hour late. I blame the hairdressers and we did struggle to get everyone assembled for the photographs before we left the house.
Geoff and I arrive at Curzon Hall.
This actually reminds me that I travelled to the church in a convertible Mark IV Jaguar. Aside from concerns about my hair getting messed up, I felt like part of the royal family as the car drove down the street I had grown up in. I don’t think all the neighbours were out to watch me pass by quite like William and Kate but I certainly remember shooting off a beaming smile and giving the royal wave en route. I also remember my father beaming as he walked me down the aisle. That was quite a long walk too and I was a little bit worried that I might trip. I don’t have the best coordination.
My thoughts are darting all over the place here. I still haven’t written about my all important dress. I absolutely loved my dress. Ever since I was a teenager, I had walked passed the Bridal shop in Roseville looking at the absolutely gorgeous dresses in the window. There is something so mesmerizing about that dream which all starts out when your toy doll marries teddy and lives happily ever after on your bookshelf. Anyway, of course, when it came to looking for my wedding dress, this was the very first place that I went. I hadn’t bought many bridal magazines at this stage. Indeed, I think I had only bought one maybe two. However, I had found my perfect dress in one of these magazines and as I was going through the dresses in my precious shop, there is was like an apparition on the hanger. I don’t even think I tried any other dresses on. That was it. I was so stoked to find “the one” and it suited me to perfection. I didn’t look anywhere else.
It was much the same when it came to choosing my engagement ring. We found “the one” at Walsh Jewellers in Wahroonga. I did have a look at a few other places but this was it. It was the one.
I didn’t mention this earlier but when my husband proposed, which was on Valentine’s Day by the way, he was really naughty. Instead of doing the big romantic proposal thing, he went the other way. We worked round the corner from each other and both our offices were expecting the big proposal that night. We had been dating for 3 years so you could say that it was time. So does Geoff get down on bended knee and do the whole proposal thing? Oh no! He wrapped up a sander he’d bought for restoring his car and gave that to me for Valentine’s Day. He really wishes that he had videoed the whole thing because the look on my face was apparently priceless. There was expecting a little black box, perhaps not with the ultimate ring because I thought we should choose that together but I was definitely expecting something at the very least romantic and instead he gives me a sander for his car. Hmm. I was not feeling philosophical. I can assure you.
The whole proposal also got mucked up by the weather. It was absolutely raining cats and dogs and there was n point going far from home especially as my husband drove a rather leaky Austen Healy Sprite. It’s a convertible and really not watertight at all. You’d have a better chance under an umbrella. We ended up having dinner at the Thai restaurant next door with its bright orange laminate tables but excellent food. While it wasn’t special in the usual sense, we were almost family there and at least our crazy mixed up engagement night wasn’t cliched.
These days, it is hard to believe that my husband and I are the same people who walked down the aisle as husband and wife to the Wedding March by Felix Mendelssohn. It feels like more than 13 years have gone under the bridge. We’ve had two beautiful but equally challenging children and my ongoing health battles are intense and that has put us all through the wringer. At the same time, we sure know how to carpe diem seize the day and have just come back from a week of skiing at Perisher and a few weeks before that, Geoff and the kids went flying in a small 4 seater Cessna with the scouts.
Life is either a daring adventure or it’s nothing.
Helen Keller
Hold that thought because it’s impossible even 13 years later not to talk about our wedding, our big day, without referring to the big Day which shook the world only two days later. We were married on the 9th September, 2001 and if you have a memory for dates, you will know that the 11th September, 2001 has since been immortalised as “9/11”. We were married on the Sunday and spent the first couple of days of our honeymoon at Whale Beach but were staying at my parents’ place on the 11th because we had an early morning flight to Auckland, New Zealand where our honeymoon would begin in earnest. I had booked the honeymoon suite.
ImageBy Robert on Flickr [CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons
It is a strange thing when you are watching an event as it happens. A plane had already flown into the World Trade Centre and I remember seeing that second plane fly in and the footage was live. It was all happening in front of my very own eyes. I didn’t know what it al meant at the time but I remember thinking that one plane was an accident but two was careless. My husband, who works in IT, was concerned that someone had scrambled something electronic. Slowly but surely, we watched New York’s twin towers crash and disappear. We had medical friends who were in New York at the time and I thought at least they would be able to help the survivors but… but….
Perhaps, it is this experience which always makes me consider the historical context of events in my family history. What was happening around those dates. Sometimes, nothing shows up but it certainly does add an extra dimension to the story. After all, no man is an island. What happens in our own backyards is part of a bigger picture.
Buzz Aldrin salutes the USA flag on the moon landing.
On this point, I should also add that I was supposed to be born on the day man landed on the moon. That was the event which, of course, completely overshadowed my birth completely.
PS: As I have often wondered how my ancestors first met and when there was that first spark, Geoff and I met at a mutual friend’s New Year’s Eve party in 1998. Another friend, had let her host a party in his apartment overlooking Sydney Harbour and the back end of the Sydney Harbour Bridge. This was a near perfect vantage point for watching Sydney’s infamous fireworks. So when Geoff and I met, there was literally fireworks. Fireworks everywhere. Now, I was supposed to be going to that party with someone else but he broke up with me that afternoon. I was feeling pretty guttered about it, of course, and I almost didn’t go to the party. Thought I’d stay home and “reflect”. However, you can’t miss a date with destiny. Only a few of us were getting together so I thought I’d better turn up. Geoff opened the door and I sensed a kindness in his face. It didn’t happen straight away but the rest, as they say, is history.
Bridget Donovan's Journey 